the community of women who've had hysterectomies is weird.

[corrvin]

In my everyday life, I come from the island of "Having a penis doesn't mean you have to be a boy, and having a vulva doesn't mean you have to be a girl. You get to decide if you're a he, a she, or a they."

And here I am somehow on the cruise ship of "You are still a fantastically feminine woman¹ who is having her uterus removed."

I don't know how I got here, I don't know how to get back, and oh my fuck am I seasick.


----
¹No I am fucking well not. Nor am I anyone's sister.

Comments

[bikergeek]

The ship will dock back at your home island eventually. Meanwhile, check the events board--I'm sure the cruise director has arranged an onboard event for your kinda folks, probably in some out of the way lounge aboard ship somewhere, you just have to find it.

(just trying to torture the metaphor until it confesses)

[corrvin]

Yeah, I've found a few places. Unfortunately, due to the asynchronous nature of these things, it's all one-way communication (I mean, I'm reading stuff about people who had their stuff done in 2013, and so on.)

[azurelunatic]

I was August.

I am so, so, *so* happy.

In case it helps, this is my experience: http://azurelunatic.dreamwidth.org/7626994.html

[corrvin]

That is a very helpful recap!! I'll do my own later this week but it probably won't be as interesting.

[azurelunatic]

I'm glad it was interesting! But it's probably better for a medical procedure to be very, very boring. I did dumbfound my surgeon when I asked about my hobby of trollhugging large men. I'm happy to say that by about 3.5 months, I was able to pick my friend up and swing him around in a circle.

The http://lgbt.technology group has a number of genderqueer/non-binary spaces, and some trans-medical spaces, which are genderqueer-inclusive. The group swings more toward transgender women, but there are a reasonable number of non-binary folk.

The abdominal-surgery-specific advice that I didn't wind up using was to clutch a pillow against my belly for anything that might be disturbing -- mine did not involve endometriosis or any bowel shenanigans, and they were mostly in and out, but apparently the pillow trick is good if there is more extensive disturbance.

[corrvin]

This will sound funny, but one of the big communities I've found is Ravelry's (the knitting website's) "This is what a Feminist Knits Like" group. They're super friendly and while most identify as women, the group is inclusive of the rest of us too. (One of the other group members had her hysterectomy two weeks ago and has been a great help).

Medical stuff is always interesting to me, except that I'm really squicked out by needles and/or blood, so like... "Wow, what's that! Oh, I better look away. Can I look back? Neat!" (My doc took pictures of the innards Monday and I haven't gotten to see them yet. Maybe tomorrow or Thursday, I hope.)

Thanks for the Slack community link. The descriptions sound like the real-time interaction I've missed. :D

[azurelunatic]

Hooray for Ravelry! I really need to start being more active there again.