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First, Keebler started making multi-grain Club crackers, which taste just like the whole wheat crackers I used to get in the early 90's. They are SO good.
Second, I've been thinking a bit about expectations. People don't communicate nearly enough about them; a WoW example-- today we did Scarlet Monastery with four players, three of whom were paladins and the fourth a warrior. We'd get into trouble because the warrior would be getting whomped on, and then all three paladins would start healing (meaning that instead of doing damage, they were spellcasting, and two of the three weren't going to be doing any good because the warrior would be full health). I guess I'm the only person left who says "Healing Soandso" in group chat, to avoid that problem. We got the hang of it eventually, but it seems silly to leave the wheel behind and reinvent it every trip!
It's not just about knowing what you're supposed to do, action by action-- it's about knowing who you're supposed to be. When you work together with others on that, then you can use your own good common sense to figure out how to accomplish your goals.
I got a little miffed earlier this week because I'd set up some time specifically to spend with someone, and his friends kept asking him to join them instead of hang out with me, to do something only he could do.
On the one hand, I'm sure if they'd known how long it took me to set up that time with him, and that I wasn't with him that evening for mere love of the activity, but because I wanted to spend time with him* they'd have backed off. (I certainly would have!)
On the other hand, he told me that he didn't want to cut his friends out of the equation, and honestly, I'm wondering if thinking "I have position X in your life, whatever X may be, and therefore I trump all people in positions X-1 and below and get to claim your time" is just monogamous thinking after all. It rather felt that way, so... I got over it. :D
I'm allowed to be miffy, but not to be an ass about it.
*"There are three possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be offered: entertainment, food, and affection. It is customary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection. As the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately. When the affection IS the entertainment, we no longer call it dating. Under no circumstances can the food be omitted."
--Miss Manners
Second, I've been thinking a bit about expectations. People don't communicate nearly enough about them; a WoW example-- today we did Scarlet Monastery with four players, three of whom were paladins and the fourth a warrior. We'd get into trouble because the warrior would be getting whomped on, and then all three paladins would start healing (meaning that instead of doing damage, they were spellcasting, and two of the three weren't going to be doing any good because the warrior would be full health). I guess I'm the only person left who says "Healing Soandso" in group chat, to avoid that problem. We got the hang of it eventually, but it seems silly to leave the wheel behind and reinvent it every trip!
It's not just about knowing what you're supposed to do, action by action-- it's about knowing who you're supposed to be. When you work together with others on that, then you can use your own good common sense to figure out how to accomplish your goals.
I got a little miffed earlier this week because I'd set up some time specifically to spend with someone, and his friends kept asking him to join them instead of hang out with me, to do something only he could do.
On the one hand, I'm sure if they'd known how long it took me to set up that time with him, and that I wasn't with him that evening for mere love of the activity, but because I wanted to spend time with him* they'd have backed off. (I certainly would have!)
On the other hand, he told me that he didn't want to cut his friends out of the equation, and honestly, I'm wondering if thinking "I have position X in your life, whatever X may be, and therefore I trump all people in positions X-1 and below and get to claim your time" is just monogamous thinking after all. It rather felt that way, so... I got over it. :D
I'm allowed to be miffy, but not to be an ass about it.
*"There are three possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be offered: entertainment, food, and affection. It is customary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection. As the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately. When the affection IS the entertainment, we no longer call it dating. Under no circumstances can the food be omitted."
--Miss Manners
